"Shopping"

Well...tonight I am attending an Open House with my boss.  I was confused as to why she would ask me to attend with her, although it's not unusual for me to attend these things...just this one.  Then it dawned on me... The open house is at a LAW FIRM.  She is trying to find me a man!  She told someone that "We're going shopping for a man for me"... OH GOOD GRIEF!!!

I'll keep you posted!!!

There has to be an APP for that!

Ok...so have you seen the movie "He's Just Not That In To You"?  Um ya....that's my life...

So The Perfect Gentleman has dropped off the face of the earth, which is a bit of a bummer.  I liked him...or maybe I just liked the idea of him, I'm not real sure which. 

18 month one night stand guy called to say "Hey, about the other night... I just want to say that, well... I'm kinda getting back with my old girlfriend"  GOOD!  I mean, oh, that's to bad for me then...

Then there's Craig... we seem to have formed a friendship, kinda... Let's give him a title...let's call him Mr. Benefit!

So what do I want?  I want an APP, a Widget, a Shortcut on my phone that will tell me what's the deal with the men I come in contact with.  I want to scan their eyeballs and look into their brains... I want to know what they are thinking from the very beginning... I mean really, is that too much to ask? 

In return I will wear a shirt or get a tattoo or something that says:

• I have a good job
• I own my own house
• I don't need a father for my children
• I am capable of unclogging drains, fixing garage doors, changing the oil in the car and killing spiders

So please approach with caution...

I Need a New Sandbox

Dinner with the girls...innocent enough.  Chips, Salsa, Beer....the usual....arriving home at 4:30am.  I'M TO OLD FOR THIS!!!

1st of all... when Molly gets out (which isn't often) she tends to go off the deep end.  We ended up on the dance floor of a local club, nothing major, just dancing.  Molly pulled a chair out to the middle of the dance floor and danced on it... while I was trying to keep track of her all the other girls left.  NICE...but that's okay because BOTH of my ex's showed up...the 18month 1 night stand and Mr. Forever. 

Now, this is the 1st time I've seen Mr. Forever since I packed up all of my shoes and the coffee pot and left, that was 7 months ago.  So, you could say I wasn't exactly prepared when he approached me.  He tried to apologize for what he did, I threw my beer on him.  Most of the beer landed on me... 18month guy saw that and cracked up laughing...so the rest of the beer went on him! JERK!

I have to tell you, the things running through my head when Mr Forever was standing in front of me were "Do I look skinny in this outfit? I hope my hair looks good. Do I have lipstick on? I shouldn't have worn these boots. Good Grief he got fat!"

So after a little drama, a little dancing and a little beer I finally convinced Molly it was time to call it a night.  2 hours later 18month guy carried her to my car and buckled her in.  He followed us to make sure she got home ok...and then I followed him to his house...

WHAT HAPPENED TO MY BAR?  Because 18month guy doesn't come close to where the bar is set...but my oh my... I did quickly remember why I enjoyed him...

HEY, don't judge me... I'm pushing 40...and sometimes it's just fun to not think about what you're doing and just do it! 

So, lesson learned... Find a new sandbox to play in...This one has too many Ex's in it!

Fat & Happy vs. Sad & Skinny

So i've decided to start working out... Why on earth would I chose to do such a stupid thing??? Well... Because after the big break up this summer I lost 20lbs... Now that life back to normal I'm worried I'll gain it back.... Plus its not like I have anything else to do right now.

With swim suite season quickly approaching & more importantly... HARLEY season... I really want to get into shape...

Ok... And the fact that I'm pushing 40... Ugh!!

So after one workout I'm having a hard time moving... I'm seriously thinking about not going back to the gym... Fat & Happy is looking better & better!!!

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Not going to work...

So I got a phone call today...from an acquaintance who would like to set me up with a friend of hers. The entire conversation was odd because this person is not someone I talk to on a regular basis and the fact that she thought of me & her friend together was interesting to me.  So I agreed that she could give him my email.
1st sign this is not going to work...he emailed me within an hour of me giving the "OK"
2nd sign this is not going to work... his email told me everything about him but his blood type
3rd sign this is not going to work...he text me to tell me he was going to call me (um...I didn't know he had my cell phone number)
4th sign this is not going to work... he called and told me all about how he was lucky the gun shot wound to his head didn't make him a "retard"
I couldn't make this up if I tried!!! 
He has invited me to dinner on Monday... I think I have to go... I'm sure it will be hysterically horrible and I'm anxious to see why on earth my acquaintance thought to set us up...

Back to Square One

So I'm over the perfect gentleman being a gentleman... I really like the fact that I'm being treated like a lady, but a girls got her limits!  And those limits are tested when the other guy calls  you out for lumping him in the "just like all the other guys" category after 1 date. 

So... against my better judgement I agreed to see Craig again... did I mention he's got a great body & a hot tub...and I accidentally ended up at his house...

So...let's take bets... I'm betting Craig doesn't call ... and the perfect gentleman is really just awkward around women... I'm pretty much out of luck either way...

The Rule, not the Exception

So... for the last few months my motto has been "If you do what you've always done you'll get what you've always gotten"...and guess what... I'm doing it again.  This last weekend I had dates with 2 different men... and since then I've been struggling with whether or not to go out with Craig again.  Today I came to the realization that he is the kind of guy that I always go for... Really nice looking, great body, not very tall, from the area I grew up in, knows everyone I know, close to my age, likes to drink and have fun.... and where has that gotten me?  NO WHERE I tell ya! (OH and he doesn't like motorcycles...that's a big fat NO!)

Now... Jack is another story... Handsome, tall, successful, world wise, older than me, not from around here, doesn't know anyone I know, has a taste for wine, doesn't mind drinking but doesn't get crazy and the most important part is HE'S A PERFECT GENTLEMAN.  I'm attracted to his personality more than anything.  He's is NOTHING like anyone I've dated EVER!  (He does like Motorcycles... so that is a bonus)

I think Craig and I would definitely have a good time together, but I'm not looking for someone to have a good time with (NOT THAT I'M LOOKING AT ALL) I have lots of friends for that.

Let's just say I was looking (BUT I'M NOT)... If I was looking I would want someone to treat me like a queen... to pour my wine, open my doors, order for me, hold my hand, talk to me over dinner at a nice restaurant...

I've moved the bar up a few notches because I have decided that being treated the way Jack treats me should be the rule, not the exception.  So, whether things progress with Jack or not the bar is set pretty high for anyone else that comes along... and Craig is just a bit under that bar.